How I Found Myself

Last night, I watched the makeover episode of the Biggest Loser. It was so inspiring. I was bursting with pride for the contestants, watching them apply what they have learned at the ranch, encouraging their friends and families to make healthy changes/choices. It was awesome to see not only the physical, but the emotional changes in them. I almost cried. It really hit home with me. I could relate to them.

You see, I've been there. Yes, I've walked in their shoes!

Believe it or not, I used to be fat. In 2007, I weighed 180 pounds. That might not sound like much, but on my frame it was a LOT!! I wore a size 14/16, I got winded easily, didn’t have any energy, was tired all the time, didn’t feel remotely sexy or attractive and I couldn’t see my damn feet in the shower!! Yes, my gut stuck out that much!!

The turning point for me was, one night after eating a heavy pasta dinner, I felt bloated and tired. I wanted to go to sleep but my husband wanted to get frisky. I wasn’t in the mood which was happening more often than not. We were still newlyweds and it was a sore subject for us. He couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to. And I couldn’t explain to him what I was feeling emotionally. When I looked in the mirror, I saw a fat disgusting girl. How could anyone want to be romantic with me? I was disgusting! Something had to change, and it did!!

Shortly after that night, I started to make changes to my eating habits. I cut out soda pop completely and increased the amount of water I drank. I cut out as much junk food as possible. I increased my fruit and vegetable intake to 5 servings daily. I cut out any foods with high fructose corn syrup, partially hydrogenated oils, and bleached enriched flour. I tried to limit my fat and sugar intake to foods with 5 grams or less. And guess what happened? The weight started coming off. Quickly, too I might add! I started making these changes in March and 6 months later, just in time for my 40th birthday party, I had lost 60+ pounds. I was around 117 – 120 pounds and was wearing a size 4.

But my size isn’t the only thing that changed. I changed. I suddenly had more confidence than I had ever had. I think it was because I was finally proud of myself for accomplishing something so difficult!! I felt better about myself than I ever had before and that spilled over into every aspect of my life. At home, I felt pretty and sexy, so hubs was happy! And at work, I exuded confidence. I felt like my supervisors and co-workers started to give me more responsibility and take me more seriously. It was such an exhilarating, liberating feeling!! I would say by losing 60 pounds, I found me!! What will you gain if you lose??